Took Azja and her sister to Manchester Airport this morning, setting off at 2am.
Started having hot flushes and adrenaline surges after about an hour, precursors to anxiety/panic attacks. It wasn't until the 4th such episode that i said anything to Azja. No idea why they started, no idea why they stopped after 4 attacks. I do know that after almost 6 months without them they have knocked me back a bit.
I had been doing really well with them, eating out, eating at friends, visiting places without ill effect and then out of the blue hit with 4 in a row in the space of an hour.
I made it home without serious incident, but its really done me over, i can't go back to that place & start again. I Thought i was free of this affliction, to live normally - if not a little nervously.
In a few days i'll most likely feel better, and i need to try to draw strength from the fact that i did continue and make it to the airport and home again.
But if i had been planning on travelling with them, i dont think i could have managed, not today anyway.
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